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Must Be the Sugar

Okay, I'm on some kind of giddy roll this morning.  And I'm SHARING IT WITH YOU!

I'm in the basement, laptop on my little work table in the corner, and Julia's watching Go, Diego, Go! on tv.  Well, she's watching in theory.  In reality she's trying to get me to stop typing and pay attention to her.  I'm having none of that.  I paid attention to her earlier.  I don't want her getting spoiled.

Anyway, a commercial came on for these little dolls called Whoopsie Doo dolls – two of them, being cared for by two cute little girls who exclaim "Oops!  She made a whoopsie!" and then they start to change the dolls' diapers.  The exciting feature about these particular dolls, apparently, is that "they do number one AND number two!"

As a mother of two children, I fail to see the thrill about that.  I was telling my sister about these things as I watched in horror, and she asked "does number two smell?" and I said I didn't think so because neither little girl had that wrinkly-nosed repulsed look I used to have when MY little whoopsie doo children did number two.

Meanwhile, Julia, who had been watching this commercial, suddenly whipped her head around to look at me, here eyes wide. 

"MOM!  I have a Whoopsie Doo!"

"You do?  No, you don't."

"I DO have a Whoopsie Doo!  I got it when I was YOUNG!"  And she flung herself off the couch and toward the stairs, determined to prove her point.

A few minutes later she was back downstairs with one of her many naked baby dolls.  She showed me the doll which did, indeed, have the same wide-eyed, open-mouth-ready-for-the-bottle face as the dolls in the commercial.  

"But that one only does number one, doesn't she?"  I asked.  And we don't even usually SAY "number one" or "number two" but we were still in commercial mode.  Anyway, she tilted the doll up so I could see the elimination area, and sure enough, there was just a little hole there, for number one.  No number two here.  Julia agreed that her doll only pees, it doesn't poop. 

And when I was looking at this naked little doll, it occurred to me that (as far as I know) they only make peeing dolls that are female.  Which…I don't know…if you're going to go to all the trouble of making these things "realistic" by including "number two" in the repertoire…why not include a boy doll?

And I was thinking, again, with realism in mind, that little Whoopsie Dan's anatomy should include a tiny little feature with the flexibility and accuracy of a garden hose gone wild.  Nothing like a geyser of number one shooting all over the room to bring some excitement to the next play date, right?

Anyway, that's just my thought for the morning.

7 thoughts on “Must Be the Sugar

  1. I do like the idea of a Whoopsie Dan … I was looking at the swivel cord on my hairdryer, and thought, yes, that sort of connection would work…

  2. Projectile vomiting… that’s good.

    When my now almost 24 year old son was younger I ask him after seeing the mess in the bathroom “are you training to be a fire fighter?”

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